Happy birthday 🎂

When I decided to travel....  Being with both my families n friends.... Yet, as I was walking forward... My heart n eyes never failed to look behind....remembering the memories..

YA Allah.....I have failed many times... I believe your decisions is the best for me...my sadness and my happiness are all yours.....

Guide me...give me the strength and never let me gone stray from your path....

Thank you..
For everything... My parents... My families... My close friends...my career....  My strength... Let me focus back on my life... I seek your forgiveness.... For everything which I failed to obey....
.. Thank you, forgiving me the chances to breath....

Give me the nur and led me to jannah your own personal paradise

Ya Allah... Thank you...and let me sujud for every event that happens in my life.... And never failed to seek your forgiveness....

Happy birthday to me.....

Looking yourself at the mirror...

There are times...writing from your heart and head.... Allows you to say what you want...ok here it goes...again....

4months ago....I hate him..yet I miss him...and the mix feeling been going on n off.... And me, finding person to hear me...understand me..knock my head.... I felt lost. Alone..... I wanted to talk and hoping we can do something... Perhaps it's too late....we made a mistake... 

Going thru n experienced first love..looking back, is the most wonderful thing that can happened.... The cries,  the laughter.. The fights.. The acceptance of two difference world yet trying our level best to stay....

It's not easy.. And we are easy expected how we want our partner to be....we hurt each other as they failed to meet our needs and expectations..... 

This is where theory meets practical.... It's not easy.... Yet again the sacrifice and tolerance.... 

I will always love him and I really miss him...now, it will always be there...perhaps, he has some plan and his reasons which he choose to stay away from me.....I have learned a big lessons during our courtship.... 

Somehow I respect him.. Cause he has the courage to love and accept me..he showed me the meaning of love.....

Admitting... And accepting...time heals... And I'm grateful for what have happened... 

Give me the courage to let go of him....one day.. The time will come....

Open the heart.... Keep my option open....

Been hearing and been advised.
Yet..tiada yg sudi berkenalan...walaupun rakan ingin memperkenalkan....tapi it will never happen....

Only him....who has the courage to say it...
To try despite what ever happens....

Boy 1: diperkenalkan.. Jumpa sekali.. Msg.. Then he stop....

Boy 2: him..2years

Boy 3:hajat nak kenal. N jumpa... Yet alasan laki tu segan...end

Boy 4: takat fb msg n watapps...
Yet..tak pernah jadi appointment yang dibuat.... Last, kne unfriend and silent di fb...
Boy 5: laki tuu berminat,  tapi masa tu dengan boy no 2....... So kne la tolak secara baik..
Boy 6: nak kenalkan.. Not going to put any hopes.. Cause I know it will never happens... It will just end there...

Entahla....  Diri seperti terasa...sukar sangat rezeki bertemu jodoh.....  Diri bukan seperti dipetik jari,  akan ada laki berani n bersungguh berkenalan....

Sebab tu...am not pretty nor a person where guys willingly to fight nor to stay nor willingness to start conversation with.

Not pretty,  nor having the aura of female attractions...

No.... I'm a dreamer...  I can only dream of a family,loves etc.
.perfect life...happiness.. .where in reality n currently.. Am not convinced I deserve to enjoy it... Redha..